we were frolicking through a fountain of pizza rolls. it was like the best dream i ever had
She told me she was selfish for not giving me a blowjob... I couldn't agree more.
Everytime I see a couple on campus walking and holding hands I just want to yell he's gonna lie!
I've been meaning to ask you. The first night in the city did we do key bumps with a suicidal homeless man? My memory is fuzzy
I'm naked in the window of the hotel and I feel like I'm walking in slow motion like a robot
you can't tell me you didn't shit your pants I saw them in the trash can by the bathroom.
Dude, I think someone on your skype account may have seen me beat off. I used your computer and didnt realize you were still signed in. Please tell me no one was on...
We're already drunk. 4 hours to go still. And there's a bear advisory. TOP WEEKEND.
I've justified worse with less. I had sex with your brother because he was wearing a nice sweater
So it was all good until she started grabbing my beard and telling me to "roar little lion"
It bothers me when I see my old fuck buddies starting families on Facebook.
There are far too many naked dudes in your apartment, and they aren't even watching porn. I mean seriously, they've got the Lion King on.
I have hobbies that aren't destroying myself and others...i can make hats.....
she's my really slutty friend i bring around so i can act slutty and not feel as bad about it
He was a half hour late. His excuse was that his brother knifed him right before he was going to leave. I didn't believe him until I saw the gauze.
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