I attract so much trash. The guy that is engaged and kissed me is here so is his fiancé. I feel likeshw knows and will cut me in the bathroom might happen. If I'm not at the pool tomorrow she has blonde hair and is really flat.
i was so high last night that i actually googled "how to get un high"
if you ask that question again our friendship is over
Wedsnesdays are always enlightening. Tonights revealation: One should not smoke from something taller than their person.
hahah your definitly as dumb as I think I thought you are. boom roasted.
I made him sleep with a condom on and i passed out on the carpet with only a bra on.
THERE IS THE SEXIEST BEARDED MAN HERE. I CAME EVERYWHERE.
She just started grabbing all the hospital's rubber gloves and face masks and shoving them in her purse, saying, "My tax money paid for these!"
That bitch ruined vodka saturday
We're bowling witha frozen turkey in the hallway...ur missing out
I'm gonna rob all up in that cradle
If your find a 12 pack on your doorstep consider it a gentleman's agreement to never speak of that night again
What do you take me for? I'm not trying to lure you into bed with stories of my dead aunt.
You're the second person to offer to fuck me in the bathroom at work. Idk whether I should feel honored, or if cvs is just a turn on.
I helped you wax your vagina and you won't even get me Corn Nuts you fucking bitch?
I can't find my keys and there's a hotdog in my purse.
Randomize
