I like waking up with a slight hangover cause I'm dehydrated and it makes me feel thinner.
i don't think you understand, blowjobs are like flowers for guys.
Jesus people on campus asked me what i do for joy. I said i love sinning especially pre-marital sex.
i'm waiting for the less fat version of him to text me
I'm eating the rest of the Xmas shrooms and welcoming 2012 by communing with the pine cone.
How much morphine is too much? Keep in mind that I'm going to my graduation dinner with my parents.
We weren't even through customs yet, and we got offered weed. You would love Jamaica.
they knew we were both to shy to do anything so they got us drunk and locked us in the back yard with a tent. it was fuck or freeze
you have the best friends
Dinner at my parents is vodka, lemonade, cheese ad crackers. Why would I leave?
Wait do you remember that guy last night asking to use my nose ring to open his beer.......
I don't know if apple cider everclear was such a good idea
He just snapchatted me a blank snap that said "miss our sex" Vagina game too strong
it'll be like a game of Russian Roulette, but with my vagina.
I cannot believe I accepted his penis into my body.
The only food I have to eat is weed gummies and magic mushrooms... This is peak 34
Randomize
