Will you Wikipedia Vin Diesel? Is he gay? It's important...
when does it stop being whiskey dick and start just being me bad in bed?
I woke up and we were making out. So the good news is that after two years off the market, I haven't lost a step. I'm picking up girls in my sleep now.
Excused from finishing the term project because my lab partner got arrested. For the second year in a row. Public school, I love you.
#1 RULE OF DRINKING: DELETE YOUR EX'S NUMBER FROM YOUR PHONE
That girl next to you randomly said that she fits into a queen sized pillow case
WTF.
I remember seeing his penis I just dont know exactly what I did with it
trying to figure out what happened last night by looking around the apartment.
naked man under the piano. THE PLOT THICKENS.
I wish you looked at me the way you looked at my brothers penis
Thinking about wearing all black to the bar tonight since I'll be attending my liver's funeral.
What is my life coming to that I have to cross state lines to get laid?
I just projectile vomited into my kitchen sink. Today need to be over already.
I need a hoe opinion
go on
And two different second-graders said my make up was pretty. It's left over from last night bc I woke up 5 min before I was supposed to leave.
My new favorite word is dickbag. I think its relevant here. And I say that with all the love in the world.
Randomize
