But, I don't have the body of a porn star, so nobody would hire me. Unless they're doing like a trip to the safari and they need an albino rhino
That girl would be way hotter if she changed her face.
So I went out tonight...met a guy who slightly resembled my dad,huge creeper, he asked me to "hang out" so I gave him my moms number since he was more her type:)
There is a pube in my fucking eyeball
Yeah I had to push her down the hallway to the hotel room in a luggage carrier. The guy at the desk told me goodluck
how thoroughly do i need to sanitize the cone the vet put around my dog's neck for it to be safe to use as a beer bong?
Found your dick twin last night
I'm sorry I compared your vagina to nascar
He drunkenly stumbled over to me and told me my "crotch looks spectacular tonight"..... i think this could work
We left the bar and you kept yelling "ONWARD SCION, TO GLORY!!"
No worries, I've prioritized my homework into "can do drunk" and "should be sober" categories. We're good.
but I'm still not sure how you became more and more fluent in Spanish the drunker you got
I used my mad pharmacist skills to turn ordinary birth control into morning after. I think my professors would be proud.
So, just how hungover are you?
Not at all, surprisingly.
That has to be your X-Men power.
I brought coffee but not enough for the naked guy on your porch
Randomize
