I fucked **** last night, don't tell mike
this is mike. we're done.
i barely touched his dick and all of a sudden he yells, "BONER!"
I feel like someone was just looking at my memory and took out an eraser and was like "nope he doesnt need that"
Last time I stayed at my moms my fucking car got set on fire sooo maybe I should think this through.
Dude..this is the third year in a row me and him have fucked at a super bowl party..does that count as a tradition?
That would warm my breasts.
In this context breast is a metaphor for soul.
He started using my brother's rc helicopter as a beer delivery device. He's a drunk McGyver.
I couldn't tell if they ere dancing or fucking but they won the costume contest
Lets just say that a certain piercing set off certain alarms when I went thru the airport detector/scanner thingie. David was high fived like 12 times.
I just sat in the bathtub with the shower running so I could eat the whole box of mega stuffed Oreos. What am I doing with my life
Do you think there are two dudes living in an apartment somewhere that go to the store and call it Brocery shopping?
Oh god...probably.
The walk home lasted longer than the sex. He lives in the flat above the bar.
Just had my first american. He tasted like freedom.
she brought her phone charger to the bar this bitch is ready to drink
If by science you mean beer then YES!!!!
Randomize
