Sry I called you an 8
U Should have said " it's ok baby most girls Sh*t when I do that.
dude my grandmas the shit. she has a sixth grade education and got hit by a car when she was 18. she cant smell.
worms taste like bacon by the way.
I always wondered what they tasted like.
Yeah I hope so. Definately just saw two freshmen in very authentic togas and cotton ball beards. This new class is stepping it up.
She used the introduce me to her roommates so she could find out my name trick the next morning..I may be in love.
It's amazing the difference a day and 2000 mg of antibiotic make. Nine days to go.
Purse pizza: the pizza you buy before the club, and you eat on the train home. I thought you knew me by now!
Apparently I got mad at you for "Not drinking with me till we thought we were seahorses" and smashed my face on your door. Then I put my feet in the oven and started crying because I was drinking alcohol from a pot. My life is spinning out of control.
If you don't get head tonight I will castrate you
Seriously. Castrate.
His balls are like really small, like dog sized balls. It was a weird discovery. Ever done a guy with dog sized balls?
My neighbour just came round to ask why we posted a spatula through his door at 3am. What do I tell him??
My throat is burning
Thats because you proceeded to drink the salsa because you thought it was alcohol...dumbass
I've been getting a lot of emails from patron lately for being a great customer. Is that awesome, or should I start thinking about seeking help?
God does not give you boobs that amazing to not share them with your friends
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