you know what scares the shit out of me? i have eaten bagel bites since i was a little kid and just in the past five years they started puting "made with real cheese" WHAT THE FUCK WERE THEY USING BEFORE? i mean ive been a bagel biter since the womb
Would love to except that I crashed into a hearse in a funeral procession about an hour ago so I think that pretty much put an end to my day.
i finally watched harry potter... a tad unrealistic if you ask me... i mean a ginger kid with 2 friends?
Pretty sure I tied my shoes laces together to keep myself from driving drunk. Fell like six times. Keep forgetting
The question is do I invite my fuck buddy to my graduation party now that my girfriend found out about her?
I made out with a guy because he was sitting on my coat...
I dont think getting to 3rd base with a girl you barely know is the type of memory they had in mind when they named the park "memorial park"
I'm eating those little wheels of cheese and watching storage wars, this is the opposite of sex.
Best thing she said after I kicked her out "rugby guys have single handedly ruined my faith in men"
Ladies and gentlemen, the only person I know who would keg stand in pearls and a bow.
My manager just held my hair while I threw up in a dumpster. New low.
He didn't even get to the first chorus of Hotel California before he started convulsing on top of me.
If you could not mention to him that I slept with his best friend, that'd be cool of you.
I think him and kristen are pretty serious now.. I dont think he cheats on her, anymore.
For some reason, my alarm clock was unplugged & in the kitchen microwave. I don't remember doing that...
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