i can smell the iron from margo's period blood from across the table.
Yeah, she'd be cute...but she has faith. It's a problem down south.
Somehow "stranger danger" turned into making out with a 25 year old on burbon street.
His pick up line was "your one sexy pumpkin, I'd love to carve." Why would you let me go home with him?
I felt so bad for you. Drunk Rachael wanted nothing more than to crawl into the cop car and give you a hug. Luckily Mollied/Barred out Rachael convinced Drunk Rachael this was a terrible idea. So I ran. I have your keys btw
My biggest accomplishment thus far this summer is having sex 5 weeks after hip surgery.
My gyno overestimated by 3 TIMES the amount of sex we have per week. First of all, he must think I'm a freak. Secondly, I think we should catch up.
Dude it's huge. I don't usually like looking at those things, but you're kind of forced to stare that horse in the face.
During sex his mom asks from the other side of the door, "Do you like avocados?" Who doesn't like avocados?
Guys, as my favorite vagina consultants I have to share something.
My professional advice is not to put lemons in your lady pocket.
I just started the bonfire using a tampon. Who knew they could have multiple uses?
Btw I have come to the conclusion that we really need to do it in a bed. Like at least once..
I honestly don't understand how your night went from singing a touching rendition of Africa to an angry political rant to low key trying to find a frat boy to bang to doing dishes to yoga
We both shit in the same closet in Santa Fe. Nothing is sacred anymore.
Totes just ripped ass and the bartender's eyes got wet
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