is it really high of me to have brought my own hot sauce to wendys?
just left a line of flour and citric acid on the dresser for my roommate to find. teach that bastard to steal my coke!
I could see myself reflected in his wedding band as i was going down on him.
Weekend has begun hello red wine at 10am on a Wednesday
PAAAANTS ARE FOR AAAASSHOLES
The party got hot, we all started raging, took off some clothes, someone threw me in the shower and we all kept raging. Nude Rager, I was there at the point of conception.
Dude if i sent you a picture of the inside of my fridge would you be able to break down and explain everything that was in it?
We also had rum, but now that's all gone. Which I feel is appropriate for a pirate party.
That guy has been pretty randomly in and out of my vagina for 4 years...I don't think I'm required to tell him when I'm dating.
Good point.
I'M MAKING HIKING PLANS WITH THE GIRL WHO IS DATING MY EX, THAT IS PERSONAL FUCKING GROWTH
took shots off of a myriad of fake boobs last night. It was glorious.
Good god, my descendants are going to be fucked.
I just mixed tangerine juice with sauv blanc. on an unrelated note, my episide of intervention is slated to run in April.
Going on a coke binge the night before your appointment with your therapist (to talk about your sex addiction) is prob not the best idea.
You went into the bathroom, got in the tub with a pillow, yelled "this isn't as comfortable as it looks in the movies" then passed out
Randomize
