you'll never believe how fucking awesome rain man is when you're stoned.
They just gave us root beer floats. I guess I won't quit my job today.
but he used his one phone call to call mom and wish her happy mothers day, that's gotta count for somethin
Dude I broke my bong in half this morning. I kicked it as I was jerking off. I would never hide anything from you.
Puked in the hotel lobby and just kept walking. I love mardi GRAS.
no i had to finish in the bathroom to a pic of her mom in a bikini.
She had one drink in her cleavage and another in her hand. She kept rotating between the two by leaning backward and then sipping the one in her hand.
High moment. Almost just passed the blunt to the dog.
Hooked up with a guy resembling a bearded Cher. I need the lenses on my beer goggles fixed. Pronto.
I just rolled a blunt at my desk. Happy early Friday!
He's pretending to be my boyfriend so that my family won't bother us when we sneak off to smoke weed
I got a hand job after work. Remember those? From the 90s...
I can't even be mad at customs in houstons airport anymore for missing my flight and having to stay overnight. Within an hour of meeting we did it at her place. Her last word being "glad I could show you real southern hospitality". I'm definitely coming back here someday
She flashed us last time and pissed all over the floor this time. I'm scared to invite her back.
My drunk is wearing off and im starting to feel like this dolphin tattoo was a bad idea.
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