singing on the bus should be illegal
huh?
There's a group of like 8 white people in the back of the bus harmonizing to sugar we're going down
I got it! After our exam we take shots for every question we skipped!!!
I don't wanna die...
you should give me head with plastic fangs in
He literally didn't stop until I lost count of how many times he made me orgasm. It took three hours.
HE HAS A CHODE. LIFE IS NOT GOING TO BE EASY FOR HIM.
Liver, I have supported you for 18 fucking years. Pull your weight for ONE NIGHT and detoxify this alcohol.
I'm so confused. I feel like I just intentionally took roofies to see where I'd end up.
I wrapped my scarf around his head and then made him go down on me
And I also said, "probe me"
Do you have any idea how hard it is to iphone keyboard type "roflcopter" when intoxicated?
So I was trying to finish off that sick uv whipped and I chased it with yogurt. Not a good idea
I just had to close my blinds so my neighbors wouldn't see me drinking a beer at 9 am. GO CHIEFS!
did i just pee glitter
I masterbated to his instagram page. Too far or....?
Well I only snuggle him I don't hump him. That's rude.
You sent me a very drunk love letter
Was it the one about pterodactyls?
I was disappointed I thought you actually loved me
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