he was going down on me when he saw the warts...nevertheless he told me he had to pick his sister up from school. why does this keep happening to me???
Sad Moment: I only had enough $ at 711 to buy chips or salsa. I chose salsa and took a plastic spoon
remind me not buy ky at kmart ever again. Had to get a manager to open the locked case. then he stood there and watched me look through the selection
I hate that ur telling me this.
All I want to do right now is burp, puke, and fart. In that order.
he wont speak to me right now because i told him it must suck knowing he'll never be as good as edward cullen..idiot.
i don't even want to say how many boners i've caused this week
noooo, I woke up on his pack porch and the SUN WAS RISING. I saw red lights everywhere and heard sirens so I just ran for my life.
some crying dude holding an empty fifth of burnetts just showed up at our door and asked 'do i live here?'
i'm forwarding you the dirty picture of that fat girl that likes me sent . i feel like since youre my best friend you should puke in your mouth too .
The problem with never associating with your roommate is that you never know if they're dead in their room with the door closed or just gone for the weekend...I sprayed some febreeze just in case.
Im on the side of I-10 covered in sweat, cookie dough, hollandaise sauce, onion gravy, and ground beef wondering how my life I ended up here
how do you play pong handcuffed?
wait he has a twin??? which one did you fuck
yes
you know you should be lucky to find the case to my dildo....that means no more random guys at the house!
I’ll call you later. There’s a jilted trophy wife looking for a revenge fuck at my door
Randomize