Forgive me I'm always horny when I wake up
party is dying down. we just wrote whore in the yard with gas. Photos to come.
I know right? mind you this is the same woman who told me when I was 12 that oral sex just meant talking dirty
i forgot how awkward it is to meet new people sober
It's offcial there's a Bobby Light radio station on pandora.
or how I got to mom's but there is vomit on my shoes. I never thought i'd be recapping with her.
whatever it's my dick and i'll put it wherever i want
I'm still seeing blue. who wrote on my bare nipple?
the two person party stopped when i realized that he tried to throw a hammer at my head.
Accidentally gagged on my toothbrush and puked up a Walgreen's cheeseburger. 1) I am not going to be on top of my game tonight. 2) Since when do I have a gag reflex? 3) Walgreen's cheeseburgers are awesome.
Im at that shitty point in my day where I start planning night activities while finger dipping vyvance off of my desk, you got any plans?
You don't realize how cold it really is...I poured my bong out the second floor window and icicles hit the ground.
Dude you're fine. You're 5 minutes away from your house and you're eating fig newtons
I didn't realize how much I relied on you for a reason to drink on tuesday
Plan b and 5 hour enegery breakfast of a champion
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