everytime someone famous vagina shows up in pics, i have to go check my own vagina to make sure mine dont look all wrinkledy and flabby like that....i want my lips plump and succulent
also, did you notice that when he quoted your email he used MLA format?
just got invited to smoke a bowl by a guy who has a prostetic leg and has been on the jerry springer show multiple times. I love my life right now
I passed out on my porch last night. I'm still making it to class. This is what growing up means.
i wasn't about to bring her gummy handcuffs to her father's funeral
It's one of those mornings where you wake up and want to go to church for the first time in ten years. THAT shameful.
I've never been to a "going away to jail" cookout. do we bring a present?
Every single item that was in my fridge is now in my hot tub. Please help
So hungover. Walked into room and poached their catering before realized in wrong place. Scowled and ate it anyway
He's rescued me passed out naked on the playground next door and I've rescued him passed out naked in the middle of campus. That's why we're a great couple.
We were ushered out of Medieval Times by a squire for making out in the torture chamber. Children were present.
slept with a 6'5 mountain man from Montana and then he played 'Girls Just Wanna Have Fun' on repeat..
Its just akward. Everytime he tells me he loves me, I have to respond with, I love having sex with you. and he just stares at me in amazement
In case you're wondering... Yes walmart will judge you for buying vodka and pickles at 645am.
I accidentally just texted my dad asking if he wants to do shrooms with me. Do I leave the city now or...
Randomize
