i've come to the conclusion that there is no classy way to apply chloroseptic spray to your butthole.
It was like my butthole was peeing. Felt comforting yet not fulfilling.
Only in college do people pre-game a meteor shower
You guys were grinding to YMCA. I knew you were going to hook up with him.
i dont understand why you dont get why i love him. i opened the bathroom door and he had his penis in his right hand and a mcdouble in his left.
You said "i miss him" not "i miss his dick." You're getting emotionally attatched. Shame.
He kept telling me that something was trying to enter this dimension from another universe through his spine...
Saxophones in my mind. I swear someone dosed me.
At this point, just throw that mattresses away. Or bronze it and display it as a testament to your shame. either is good.
I'm ashamed and embarrassed. Unless we get drunk and have random sex with people we will never see again we might lose ourselves.
I'm sure I'll run in to him again, there's only so many VA detoxes.
You were holding onto her boobs like you were adrift at sea and they were the only flotation devices
I 100% barfed while bumping the DMX remix of reading rainbow
I just fuked with kevins application and made it say that he does conjugal visits for community service
hey some people donate their time while apparently kevin donates his body
I'm about 40% drunk. You know, not drunk enough to light the bar on fire, but drunk enough to let the cougar hit on me.
Randomize
