DUDE DUDE I JUST GOT TH E BEST IDEA FOR A CHILDRENS BOOK "If You Give A Girl A Blow Job"
She was hit by a car at 47 mph and lived. That explains everything.
I got a lot accomplished today, and the day is still young! I built a fort, hot boxed a fort, had a tea party in a fort, and now realizing how high I am.
I think i'm just gonna start shot-gunning everything that comes in can form.
I mean it's not my fault he had a floor mat that read "put out or get out". What was I supposed to do?
Did you pour a hundred fucking pounds of sand in my car last night?
lol... you weighed it?
Every girl my sister has brought home from college I've had sex with, check and mate motherfucker
Nothing says "future AA member" like bonging 40's out of a plastic flamingo.
And if I could both stabilize myself *and* pick things up with my penis... Well, I wouldn't be on the fire dept...
Duuuude someone spilled hot sauce all over the floor and trailing outside wtf
OH GOD IT'S BLOOD. THIS IS ALOT OF BLOOD.
Just when I thought I was growing up, I go out and TOTALLY REDEEM MYSELF
you don't even have a vagina so you don't get to tell me what to put in mine
I feel like you can't break up with someone on 420. It's against stoner code
Why would you call when you knew I'd be having sex!?
Why would you answer?
I can see. My condolences to your vagina.
Randomize