My drunk dialing habit needs to go. My drunk habit can stay though.
His stupid grin looks like he's mid-ejaculation
idk if ive ever seen a picture of him on facebook with his pants on
he's got a countert top full of yard sale blenders so id say maragita wednesdays is a go.
just peed on the 7/11 floor and casually left. Omg so drunk
After he called me a "spirited little girl" I realized that I need to stop sleeping with guys more than ten years older than me.
Not sure. No solid plans. Just tanning nude.
I hate that he uses me for something other than sex. What does he think I am? His girlfriend? Ha.
he was having a black light party and drinking manischewitz wine out of a three foot tall trophy he stole from mcdonald's...that's when I decided it was time to leave
She said she's different now I guess anytime you get a bible tatt it automatically cancels out all the whoring you did for 10 years
He told me he was married and then fingered me on the kitchen counter. It was awkward to explaining the broken toaster to my roommates this morning...
IT IS EARTH DAY, RECORD STORE DAY, 4/20 EVE, AND SATURDAY ALL AT THE SAME TIME!
Why can't I come over and snuggle you and make you lick my boots
You kept insisting you found queso that's better than oral sex
she brought her phone charger to the bar this bitch is ready to drink
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