winter break is gonna be like a weird mixture of rehab fat camp and holiday cheer.
I think it was the chocolate body paint and awesome blowjob that finally made us official.
He upper decked the toilet, got himself lit on fire 6 times and lit 4 other people on fire in the course of 3 days.
I'm a little nervous about this St. Patty's Day party. Seriously, we're still finding stuff from the Halloween party.
It's just like riding a bike. Only it's a dude's face.
It's like you're the one guy who got the "girls have clits" memo.
I fail to see the problem of enjoying a glass of wine while I poop...
the point I'm tryimg to make is that you didn't need to take the whole box in with you
You know what? The sex was so bad that I don't even care that I gave him strep.
I'll probably just end up banging you in your parents marital bed,in their honor of course.
Wait I can't come yet Mr. Brightside is playing
ok i defs just took my shirt off in the middle of a frat party though so keep me updated
I had to ask her to let go of my cock this morning so I could go home. She just kept saying "no, please, no..."
Maverick's sitting in jail wearing a turkey costume and I am soooo jealous.
i'm not too sure if he's up to my expectations looks-wise, but in the penis department he exceeds ALL regulations.
Idk if you've ever tried hysterically crying in the shower listening to Florence + The Machine but it's honestly a life-affirming experience
Dude, running 15 min late.
Let's play a game, you pay for all the drinks I can finish before you get here. Go.
Randomize
