Um, I don't know who U MEANT to send that to, but yes I WAS going to fuck you. Instead you can go play Halo with ur friends.
I can't get out of the parking garage so now I'm staying downtown....Typical
I am pretty sure he just licked my hand while trying to sing goo goo dolls iris to me. Get me out of this state.
It's 3am, i just got back from ht e bars and registered for classes larteeeeee. History of baseball at 8am? at least ill meet the only stragiht gusy at NYU!
She looks like if Peter Griffin was a lesbian.
Run away.
My middle name is suave and my vagina shoots rainbows, what else would you expect?
He talked to you for like two seconds while you were shit faced doing Forest Gump impressions...how is that possible?
Like actually I will be single and sad and lonely for ever. Cheese will be my life partner. Robot sex is my future.
What's the polite way to tell someone she's a grown ass woman and she needs to start acting like it.
Death by dick. An honorable death. Put a picture of his dick in the photo collage at my funeral.
well ya only live once...
that cant be your answer for every horrible thing you do
"fuck it, let's do moonshine" shouldn't be in ANYONE'S vocabulary.
But I thought it was so funny last night
You also thought you were a gypsy mermaid last night
I'll give you another blowjob if you bring me some cake.
don't worry, i'll dog sit again, the barking made the sex better, its like he was cheering for us, we were just THAT good.
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