It's like Facebook knows when I'm about to masturbate and tells me to reconnect with exes.
I just had a librarian tell me that "wikipedia is like sex"
When he expanded on the analogy it actually made sense. "you're going to do it either way, so I'm just going to tell you how to do it safely."
dude, i think we just came across a situation where tits weren't worth it.
I don't care if its bassically 3rd world. A country without a drinking age is a country without a drinking age.
we may have ended up at a gay bar on accident. we're gonna work this to get free drinks.
What's the appropriate I've been inside you but we're not technically dating valentines present?
I just threw up trying to put pants on. This is obviously a sign to stay naked.
is it possible i asked you to give me a preliminary pap smear?
I'm sorry and I love you. One day we're going to live in a whore mansion with our babies and make boys cry.
We have 24 days left before I leave for college and 21 condoms left in the stockpile. Are you up for the challenge?
did i make more ranch sandwiches last night
you had 4
You could totally spank that new found Catholicism out of him.
My liver is preforming stress tests.
Do you think if I explain to her I want to have loud, unprotected sex with her sister she'll understand?
Get over your kidney infection all ready. You have been sober for too long.
Randomize
