she came over and started getting naked and said its not like i came over to just hang out
youve hit the jackpot
Should I be offended if he asked if he could use saran wrap to eat me out?
All I seem to do lately is get myself off, take naked pictures and drink beer. I don't know if thats a good or bad thing.
I didn't exactley write on my bucket list -- "hook up with a townie at a drivers intervention program"
Right now I can't do anything that will ban me from donating plasma. That is a legit source of income for me.
i pretended i was deaf and got a girl to come home with me
I consider myself an expert at getting drunk and embarrassing people at weddings.
Gregs sitting in the living room in his underwear hitting the bong watching a rob schneider movie. His lack of fuck giving is inspirational
Holy hangover, going dancing with family good idea, taking the last shot with the transvestite bar owner not so much...
My only positive piece of news is that my roommate is moving home for the summer, so our stress-relief sex will be much easier to get away with.
I'll be in SoCal at my bachelorette party, aka embracing a fireman covered in KY and chocolate shavings.
You dropped a beer and it was like when wilson floated away. Complete with sobbing apologies
Shit, no womder she didn't wanna fuck me
fuck whipped cream. I'd eat vegetables off those abs
he fucked me wearing a cowboy hat and made grits after
We call him Texas for a reason.
I lost my cyber virginity to a guy I barely knew in high school while a Togepi Plushie watched.
Randomize