What was that guy's name that you dated that wore the leotard?
I lost my shoes and bra and was beyond mapquesting
The only thing he got me during our relationship was a cum stain in my backseat. I choose winners.
He said I came instead of I'm coming. I wonder if he noticed my state of confusion when I stopped blowing him.
Wasn't he an English major?
Uh, do you remember who's thong is in my tree?
scarred for life. way too high and witnessed some chick give a dude head on the dance floor
Porn. Physics. Porn. Icecream. Porn. That's my life now.
He only likes me when I'm naked and I don't like being around him clothed. It's the perfect relationship.
at work, .. 47 yr old boss was in a fight. 2 BLACK EYES. I may get fired. I cant stop laughing
WTF DUDE?
Stay calm. I'm sure there's a heterosexual explanation for this
I'd rather be sodomized with a fullly decorated Christmas tree.
You called it motorboating but you just snot rocketed into my tits.
I'm having a hard time eating my sandwich knowing how many different buttholes my hands were in last night.
I have 2 bottles of wine, a sharpie, and a panda mask and don't have to wake up early. Can u do the math on this?
I have cats now. Five of them.
Have you considered starting a global domination firm?
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