Is masturbating to pics of your ex on Facebook considered cheating?
You are proof that most things are best left unsaid.
I had to remind him that there is no "age exchange rate" between the u.s. and spain, and that 16 will always equal 16
I'm not really that drunk, but I think vampires should glow in the dark because otherwise it's just unfair
Found more tequila
Dude, I just spun my iPhone on my boner without it falling off. I belong in cirque du soleil.
Do the low cut shirt test. If he stares at your tits even in front of your brother, he's down.
I may or may not have had sex last night then sent him home on a bike with two flats
I thought my ass was sore from the gym then I realized it was from being spanked. Confusing time in my life.
my friend was passed out in the bathroom so I threw up in the coffee maker, not the pot the water reservoir that kind of drunk.
My uterus feels like it went 8 rounds with Mike Tyson. And that was only a quickie.
Actually, I may scrap this entire plan. I just realized that I had sex with a guy with his own whiskey commercial.
when in doubt, mount your coworker in the staff room.
I just watched your sister pour half a bottle of cotton candy flavored snow cone syrup into a bottle of marshmallow flavored vodka, take a swig, frown, and pour a cherry coke in.
Just wait until she offers you a "powerita"
I feel slightly un-patriotic right now... I just got cock blocked by the Air Force!
Hey, I was just wondering why i dont have a shirt on, why im cuddling with a furnace, why im in my own basement, and where my car is.
Is it bad that I like to have a guy to flirt with in every class? I feel like it's excellent motivation: to shave, to shower and to show up.
Randomize
