Just found a keg and a mini-bike in our garage, this couldn't possibly go wrong
it was like that last scene in "It's A Wonderful Life" but with alcohol
How can you turn a kayak date down? I'M TALKING RIVER HEAD HERE.
I've been practicing for you. Including stockpiling medical supplies for curing hangovers.
Apparently drunk me thinks it's a good idea to put drops of acid in assorted open drinks in the fridge... This should be a fun week.
its kind of scaring me that i am turned on by tom cruise in rock of ages
i know you're at the dentist, but this dick pic was too phenominal to wait and i deserve immediate tit compensation
The token old dude at the show tried hitting on us by telling us his favorite rapper was Cayenne West.
My worst fear almost came to light...I was choking and the cats stared at me like they had no problem eating my face if I died
You have not lived until you've puked on your sequined UGGs in the Rite Aid parking lot while going to buy emergency contraceptives.
You walked up to a random girl on the street and asked her for a bite of her pizza...
You were drunk at 5 You went to the dining hall and cried because your brain and fingers weren't working. Your RA came up to you and suddenly you became sober. I was very proud of you.
we're spending all day in bed drinking spiked eggnog and fucking
Molly I still can't believe u puked in that guys hands and still got laid
How did I get up here...did jesus lift me up
Randomize