I didnt attack him, I heard I threw a chair at him- big difference. And you know Im not a creep so whatever
Pretty sure she's used to bigger guys. She kept slipping off while on top. like, constantly
I just experienced a full blown christian wedding. I am SO GLAD YOUR WEDDING WASNT THIS.
They were so slutty we had to play "rarely have I ever."
We decided to smoke and then made crosses on our foreheads for ash wednesday
mom would be proud
Its become more of a routine.. Whenever I get done eating and have left overs I just take it over to his house and throw it all over the walls and windows. Pay backs a bitch ehhhh
The night was going well until I found tufts of my hair in the freezer. Then I got nervous
Also while I am being the bigger person I plan on bringing over something strong smelling and/or alcoholic to torture the poor hungover bastard
Wow. I grabbed the wrong container to rinse my contacts- it was a beer. And it comes out waaaay faster than saline.
can't blv i tried using a "backpack" as a unit of measurement...i drank a lot of beer last night
If you need me I'll be getting drunk in a chewbacca onsie like a real adult.
Drunk within and hour of coming home from work, merry christmas bitch
"keg stand!" on a roof abruptly turned into "call the medics"
long story short... we may or may not have lost your car.
I can barely operate my hands; what makes you think I can operate my dick
Randomize
