so last night after we hooked up i got my period and woke up this morning with a blood stain on his bed and not only was it huge but i had put my jeans back on before bed so i took the walk of shame with period stained pants
The guy I was getting with last night took off his purity ring mid-sex and threw it across the room.
I've never played a more sexually-tense game of Uno in my life.
We had an indepth conversation about his employment at Arbys..
Its official. Girls from Indiana do not give rim jobs.
My professor just used the phrase "balls deep in your mind". My day is officially made.
Just beat 2 Norwegian women in beer pong. Never been so proud to be an American.
We're knee deep in HJ's right now.
I feel like that needs to be the last time i end a text with "fuck them i love tequila".
Yeah I was convinced everyone knew I was high. Time was passing way too slowly for anyone NOT to notice.
I'm not entirely sure what happened last night, but I think I dislocated my kneecap during an epic Mario Kart battle...
You were naked too, so it cancels out. We're straight.
We watched game of thrones, broke up and I drove away blasting ridin solo while he dougied
Let me get this straight. You stopped mid foreplay to shave your legs?
Um yeah. I wasn't about to shave them if nothing was happening. And I have HBO. It's not like he's the victim here.
When we started the night I was in zebra wedges & she was in my black boots... I woke up wearing pink flip flops & the mirror on my rental is fuxked up. Wtf happened last night?
Randomize
