he kept bringing up different times we had sex and i wouldnt say anything back. i would never confirm nor deny the situation...like a politician ya kno
this morning he rolled over looked at me and said "oooo, you look like i need a drink" and then put on his clothes and left without another word
angela screamed across the room SHES A CHAMP when i told the pharmacist plan b doesnt make me throw up
I love how adderall is equivalent to money on a college campus. just got a ride home and paid the driver in adderall...yeeah buddy
Sex should be hot, sweaty, messy, and a little painful. At no point should it involve tiny rocks
At this point I feel like i'm never going to be sober, and it's frightening
My dealer's mom died on christmas eve. Is it too soon to see if he's holding?
Uh oh I Hage to dance yes, my feet are Whitney Houston
sooo... you have no idea who nailed their tubesocks to my wall?
All I I know is that there's 2 new contacts in my phone. Drunk Backdoor and Gayass Handshake. Thanks, Jameson.
I'm like a walking PSA for tequila shots
Wanna play whack-a-mole in my pants?
Your word choices worry me.
So you're saying that I ended up challenging a dude to Uno then proceed to punch them in the face?
I know you’re not my dad, but you’re someone’s dad. You’re also like a second dad to me as well. And one who I send nudes to as well. Happy Father’s Day
I just want a man in my bed on a regular basis, who cuddles, and who I can also occasionally hang out with outside of my bedroom. Is that too much to ask for?
Randomize