and the mascot is a pinecone. its really no surprise that people here dont get laid
When I told my mom I was having a rough time, she responded with "pop a xanax, take a nap, and when you wake up all will be right with the world." My mom is finally starting to shape up.
I looked at the bar tab this morning. The bartender added a $25 'customer asshole fee'. I have no grounds to dispute it.
Using 'equal to a modern day cock block" in term paper, inappropriate
You got cut off after you tried to make the dog funnel moscato.
There are work activities and non work activities and dunking my head in a bucket of ice water pulling it out and shotguning a beer is certainly not a work activity
Question: would asking the hot guy from the grocery store to "beer me" his number be a poor decision?
I have a broken liver
I see that the whole "let's take a break from drinking" has worked out really well for us.
She was horrified when I asked if they had any strap on chin dildos, I was at a sex shop for gods sake must I be judged everywhere
I don't want sex or anything I just really need someone to appreciate how shiny my hair is
We were taking body shots by lunch. I love college.
Says the girl who left her friends to go have phone sex in the bathroom at Michael's
My glasses were in the garbage this morning
she just kept pointing at the cows and calling them field penguins
A total of 3 guys left my apartment this morning. That was my first clue to my black out endeavors last night. Gotta love wine Wednesdays.
Randomize
