4:12a: just got back to his place now. I don't want to talk about it
I saw her while sober, and she is definately cut off from the penis ride
and next time when you feel me up, do it right
discovery: the myth about swedish girls giving good head? not a myth.
you kept telling everyone that you were the mayor of silverware town
we just watched the ball drop on the spanish channel. best mistake of my life.
You told me you were allowed to keep eating butter because it had just passed midnight and you were on the next day's daily fat servings
I just got a high school volleyball teams practice cancelled because I slept with the head coach through their practice time.
Talking about the game in the closet with a banana wearing sunglasses.
I love you more with every blowjob.
You should write for Hallmark.
I keep confusing the name of her and her dog. Both are appropriate.
I hope Team Snapchat has been enjoying our sex snaps all this week.
I already left my house once this summer. Maybe we could do something in October.
so I think we need to change lawn care services...the guy woke me up by the pool while I was naked...told me he already picked up all the beer cans for us and gave me his number for the next time we party...
According to the office gossip the new secretary is “a homewrecking whore”. Think I should spend $27 on a fake wedding ring?
Yes! Want that picture of you and my nephew?
Randomize