hey no worries the mystery has been solved- i jst sneezed and my undies popped outta my nose.
I Bought a bracelet with bible characters and a charm broke. the virgin mary one. Do you think it's a sign?
He was so drunk that he tried to backflip off a baby chair.. How do you think that ended?
I dk what to do with this kid he is like legitimately interested in my life.
Ya well my good-girl image was pretty much blown when he found out I'm going to jail soon.
How do you not remember seeing the kid from our chem lab table and repeatedly yelling "lab partners for life!" at him?
My day may involve a drug pinata. I LOVE MY LIFE.
sorry to break it to you, but he's definitely fucking that other girl now...
I wish I still at least had the bruises on my ass to remember him by.
I need a good cry or an orgasm and neither of them are gonna happen to me and i'm so frustrated
I knew it was Christmas when someone handed me a stocking filled with airplane bottles. Ps just woke up 3 days later
He came on my face and he was genuinely concerned about getting it in my hair. I'm marrying him.
I have photo proof.
Girl, don't care. What's my rule? If I don't remember it, it never happened.
You just kept yelling "you ain't got no pancake mix." to the tv screen
I woke up to the smell of shame and vomit in my hair... went to the bathroom to shower and passed out... woke back up naked with the blow dryer on... thanks for making my birthday a success
never let me tell the bartender to cut me off, i basically told on myself
Randomize
