umm..so Dad's wearing a thong, I don't know what to do
put a dollar in it?
ejected that DVD during the department meeting.. it was our porn from last night. I have a new nick-name at work.
im too high. i could barely wash my hair, let alone handle a whole shower
Took an aderol, wrote a differential equation for solving volume of flow of a rectangular channel with change in depth, then masturbated for the 6th time.
So at this point...I'm sure you heard the story about Saturday night
Do you think anyone has ever tried to have sex with a cows udder before?
I feel uncockblockable...banged her in the bathroom with my iv still in
The entire defensive line took care if me when I passed out. One of them even held my hair when I puked and the other carried me upstairs to bed. God I love football so much more now
Trust me I was high for like 5 years...I got this
I think it's starting to become crucial that I find a companion for my vagina.
most of the afternoon was spent sneaking around my house and alternating which bathrrom to throw up in.
Running errands with mom, cool. Coming to pleasures with mom for her valentines night, not ever in a million years cool.
I walked in on him fucking my best friend. I think we've reached the point of following each other on twitter.
I think I was just hit on by Jesus Christ. This is not okay. Bad Touch. I NEED AN ADULT!
Calm the hell down, it's just stoner Bob.
He smoked and I was tired so left before we did anything. I literally left him high and dry.
Randomize
