either fucking kiss her or kick her ass to the curb. Either way I can hear everything you are saying
Wasted at the beach. Toasting underage, overdeveloped girls. God bless 'em.
he was humming party in the usa while we were having sex.
he is the anna nicole to my 90 year-old billionaire. i'm grateful that he's fucking me, so i'm buying him shit.
the spit in my mouth is still 99% not mine.
I feel like college is just an experience in what names I can't name my future son.
Tonight marks the 1 yr anniversary of me waking up in a bush. is that reason enough to celebrate?
He was going down on me as I discovered a spaghetti-O on my boob. Its been a while since I faked it.
Cats found the secret coke stash again
They owe us $80.
Don't. You get on the 18 year old. I'll get on the 38 year old. Together we will bridge 2 decades of cock.
I don't know if I'm feeling really nervous right now or just extremely horny.
I got his number because he was "impressed with how much I could handle"...I was chasing shots with Olive Garden breadsticks...
I was planning out a scrapbook to memorialize my affair.......and that's when it hit me, I don't make good choices. On the upside, the scrap book came out great and I am glad I saved all the gate passes from the airport.
I started my period on international women's day. It's like the world is congratulating me and punishing me for being a woman at the same time
I have alotted at least an hour for ugly crying.
Randomize
