There is an asian family here, I heard the mom call her son onyong
it wasn't sex, it was awkward naked time.
i saw like six of her guido cousins in the jersey shore trailer alone. her family is having a dinner party for the premiere tonight.
Last night was proof dads should hug their daughters more
It's official, my little sister has hooked up with more girls than I have.
I'm sorry for coming into your work place and trying to smuggle you out in my purse.
i still can't believe we survived that barcrawl. the third bar had bullet holes and we still went in.
The girls at the police department photocopied my drinking ticket and told me to frame it and hang it on my wall. Then they gave me a free muffin and told me to party smarter next time.
I didn't ask to see his penis, it was an ambush. Impressive though
Those tiny little fruit fly looking mofos. They fly past the phone and I grabbed them like Daniel-San
WHAT IS MY LIFE THAT THE ONLY PERSON INTERESTED IN FUCKING ME IS MY 6TH GRADE MATH TEACHER
Tried to shave my legs but the rug burn on my knees from last night got in the way.
She was riding me and giving me score updates to the basketball game at the same time..... Shes a keeper
My fuck buddy and I talked about Amelia Bedilia for ten minutes before having sex. I think I'm in love.
He’s like Batman if Batman went down on me and gave me multiple toe curling orgasms. He left without saying a word before I pulled the pillow off my face
Find out if he’s shared his techniques with a friend and set me up with him. You know I’ve always had a thing for Robin!!!!
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