Btw the nut in my hair goes great with my outfit !!! :(
I think I'm going to start texting all the people that don't want to talk to me
I felt like Norm from Cheers walking into the free clinic.
we're taking a shot everytime we receive a "Happy Thanksgiving!!!!!" mass text. up to 7 since 10am. God help us.
My water bill is like twice the normal amount. I need a boyfriend.
Do I even want to know?
Just because we buy weed together doesn't mean were a couple
I can trace it back to that drunken night where we peed on each other in the shower.
at least the person I hooked up with donates to charity, the shirt I was wearing this morning was his relay for life shirt.
I'm high and I have a consensual booty call on the way and just thought that it was a good time to let you know that I think that you are a stellar person.
New fuck buddy and long time fuck buddy are carpooling home for thanksgiving. #10hrconvoaboutmyblowjobskills
Yup on the verge of buzzed and drunk. I managed to make my way into my cat's box house to fall asleep. I'm comfortable
You give an incredible blow job. I wanted to make sure you know it was appreciated
What can I say I sleep with 40 year old Cougars because my mother gave me away at birth and apparently that's why says my therapist
So I bought that bathing suit yesterday and got buyers remorse so I returned it today and then stole it. Win win.
I'm just gonna ride this ego train to sex town
Randomize
