I guess what I'm trying to say is you've fucked more people than the economy.
my periods are so regular now that they are sync-ed with my subscriptions of vogue.
In The Air Tonight was playing in the dentist's office. Had to stop the cleaner to do the drums.
Why did I wake up holding food tongs?
I got pulled into the conversation by "she sleeps with everybody" then "she" involved sleeping with "cocks the size of a viva burrito"
High enough to ask the woman at best buy if she ever feels like she's swimming. and telling the man outside that he smells like happy juice.
Passing out on a toilet is not classy no matter what you're wearing. Not even a pea coat.
I know you're my sister, but I'm pretty sure I'm going to have sex with one of your exes this weekend. He's probably not gay, but I'll let you know.
She's calming us down by shoving oreos in our mouths
yea but i missed the pot and poured the boiling water on my dick. shit hurts. aint nothin easy about that mac
He's drunk and I'm pain-killer high and we're about to watch fireworks at disney world. It's gonna be fucking magical
I gave him a blowjob to kill bill. 2 of my favorite things.
Would it be weird if I bought knee pads and shin guards to fuck in my car?
when the cops came she just started yelling at them "Fuck the police! freedom of speech bitches!"
It was funny for a while but 3 days later I still can't walk and I've constructed a diaper-like contraption to hold the ice pack on my vagina.
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