Do vagina's smell?
I have a new drinking limit. I'll stop when I know I'm going to untag the picture that was just taken of me.
as i creep her facebook pics from back in the day till now, i noticed that her lazy eye has gotten better
I just karate chopped a humming bird out of mid air. It came at my face while I was out side smoking. Scared the shit out of me. My ninja skills just took over. Haha. I mean really at that point it was me or him.
I have better things to do with my life than be faithful.
I saw a groundgog last night outside my back door. I now have a new wedding gift idea.
I drank enough to tranq a steed. You really missed out
I want to wear Christmas sweaters with you.
Last night someone asked you what your favorite color was and you said "bagel."
Also I'm so used to having sex with river guides that when he pulled out a condom I was actually surprised
You let someone poor beer into my mouth off of a balcony. Best friend test failed.
Haahahahahahhaaa
I don't know how a coffee date turned into road head. But hey
A condom just fell out of me. Happy Tuesday.
I am confused/concerned about the circumstances that led to your consumption of 3 beta fish last night.
I just sharted for the first time in my life. Age 33. Lying in bed. Sober. 2021 is off to a great start!
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