Do they fuck in the end of "Lady and the Tramp" or am i just wasting my time
You kept buying everyone Washington apple shots, and telling us we needed to support local produce.
She said "Lay the fuck down and ill show you how its done. Ill get us both off." I did. And she did. Best words ever said before sex.
Shoot me. Guy hitting on me with a beaver on his head. Says it is his spirit animal.
Half my face is frozen, my vagina is broken, I'm wearing only gym shorts eating a plate of mashed potatoes, avatar is on my tv. There's a naked guy on my couch whose name idk. I needa talk to you asap
I really gotta be careful. My email inbox is equal parts notifications from instructors and this dude's dick. If I get drunk and reply to the wrong thing I might get kicked out of grad school.
Do you count doing $200 of coke off his dick until 6am as a successful rekindling of our relationship or...
Why is there ANOTHER stolen fire extinguisher in my room? You know that's a felony right...
Miscalculate d the jungle juice, it's actually 10%. Can't taste the diff anyway but my stomcha is warm. Come play pongm.
he started frosting cupcakes and licking the mini-spatula realllllly deliberately and i don't know if i'm more attracted to him or the cupcakes
Captain Morgan does not know self control. Nor does he teach it.
I found a 9 minute video on my phone of you singing into an eggplant.
I found a loose wire in my thermostat. Couldn't find the pliers, so I used a nipple clamp to fix it.
Just took an Adderall with Pedialyte so I think that's a valid answer to "how are you doing"
I have a dinner date combo blowjob event with Tristan tonight.
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