just saw an old couple make out...not too sure how I feel about it. though I will admit at one point I was thinking "oh yeah! get that!"
he said he doesnt sext because the government can tap that kind of shit too. no boobie pics for him.
finally achieved: got laid in the religion section of borders. thought you should know.
She threw up in the hot tub how's your night
by 11 am we'd already been drunk twice. how much lower can you go?
...i'd have to set their sheets on fire.
You're just jealous because you lost me and I ended up at another party licking Marshmallow Fluff bikinis off of lesbians.
You'd think, but when you nail one sorority sister, you might as well have nailed them all.
I was giving a campus tour, when a drunk senior came up behind me and shouted at the group, "If Jesus ain't your homeboy - get the fuck off this campus!" Looks like his religion course is paying off...
She's cool and all but if she eats my food again I'm gonna fucking drop kick her ass. No one touches my lunchables. NO ONE.
The laundromat is nothing like In the pornos
It's like those toothpaste commercials where 4 out of 5 dentists would recommend your vagina
So far my survey results are telling me to pawn the ring. Thoughts?
just put a ruler in a cup trying to measure how much ivve had to drink..... God help me
You chipped your front tooth on the toilet bowl. Should I call your dentist?
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