But do you think a lot of ppl use facebook as a masturbation supplement to porn?
Let me make clear that I am not a facebook masturbator
WTF why am I in the Atlanta airport?
seeing an 80 year old woman puke in the bushes changes everything...
that's spring break in florida for ya
i almost hope i AM knocked up so i can ruin the rest of his life
the most drunk i have ever been? possibly. the most drunk i have ever been on a monday? definently.
i'm gonna start fucking more girls with asthma. help feed my ego.
I just had to explain to my 62 year old advisor what "tea-bagging" was in the middle of her lecture. I smell extra credit. And maybe a demonstration.
you have failed as an in class drinking partner.
Idk tell her to wear something sluttty. I have that one skirt I got arrested in if she wants to borrow?
I've found myself wondering why I WASN'T naked before, but I generally always know why I am naked. Except now. WHY THE FUCK ARE WE ALL NAKED
So, got kind of drunk last night, made out with some guy, and somehow stole his credit card. Don't even know.
i gotta stop hooking up with people just to get to their dogs
To me, you're the Patron Saint of good music and handjobs
I just want him to go down on me while I eat a burger. Is that too much to ask?
I forgot a room to the key..so whenever you wake ip and read this...I'm sleeping inthe hallway..please find me
Randomize
