Its a bunch of hippies dancing in front of a stobe light. For ten dollars I could have gone to the strip club and at least had a lap dance
I just watched Juno. I kind of wish I was in highschool and pregnant
Just wanted to let you know that I always win at "whose ex is crazier" because of you.
i came home at 4 a.m. and made a dozen eggs and three lbs. of bacon. my mom woke up and the only thing she was pissed about was that i used the whole carton of eggs, but then she sat down and ate with me
I'm sad your dog died... Her name is my stripper name.
There are taser marks on me. Your face flashed before my eyes when i woke up and saw them.
We carried on a casual conversation about plants while I gave him a hand job.
I gotta figure out which 7 tampons in the box contains the drugs
am i gonna have visuals on this?
you are gonna see the trees puking up fireworks and ninja pheonixes will shit rainbows and fire
Please come and rip my uterus out before it does it itself
They have a genuine stripper pole secured to the floor of their living room. I am thoroughly take advantage of it. I've made $5 so far. Why don't more places have poles??!
Have a glass of wine with dinner they said. Your hydrocodone has worn off they said... NOPE
Oh yeah. I pretty much fucked the universes brains out lastnight. It was glorious.
I’m a coke loving, addy selling, pot smoking CRIMINOLOGY major. If there isn't irony in that I give up.
She was just trying to do dick voodoo. Pretty standard stuff.
Randomize
