I'd wear matching sweaters with you
why do i have 22 missed calls from someone who is literally saved in my phone as bumrape star??
is it gross that my labia hangs so much that guys can't find my clit?
He was legit dry humping me to the sportscenter theme song, awkward i think SO.
can a guy be partially circumsized? cause i dont exactly know what i was lookng at...
considering how much of last night I don't remember and the amount of ones laying on my desk right now, it's safe to say I'm concerned
I had to keep telling myself 'you can't be mad at him because you peed on him'
Are you drunk? Because I am and if you're not, this may be very awkward in the morning
Thats for me to know and you to find out.
Atlanta road trip update. Jimmy fell into the petting tank at the aquarium. And freaked out. With cops now... Keep you posted
Can't even walk I haven't tried talking but I probably can't do that either
Was there a condom involved? Because he was saying he wanted a kid. Repeatedly.
You were typing for me while I was hyperventilating into a paper bag on the floor.
Made out with some dude at the bar last night. Was fun until he thought bohemian rhapsody was by The Who
I've never met a penis that didn't think I was awesome.
Yeah come over whenever. Weed gets here at 8.
I'll be there at 7:59.
Randomize
