We are surrounded by old people. Heavens waiting room for sure.
Just showed mom and dad the pics from San Francisco, while i played the Full House theme song in the background.
no i decided against it. savin my coke binge for finals week.
The cops forgot your handle of tequila when they took you away. Taking shots in your honor amigo
I'm sorry for gagging during our first time having sex
I was drunk
Please answer
Oh and no more ball pics to my family. Got in a little trouble over that. They have no sense of humor.
i woke up to you and that girl going out onto the balcony naked
oh sorry man.. we went outside because we DIDN'T want to wake you
Yeah, but she is forever sending my vagina on some sort of mission.
How are you feeling?
I mean, shattered dignity aside, not bad.
He is such a generous lover, I can look past the fact his name is fucking Bob.
I shoulda been born a dude. There's too much power in a vagina.
i just hope we're both dead or in prison at the same time
I didnt know whether I was going to vomit or orgasm because I was feeling both sensations
Just bought 2 liters of wine and frozen waffles for dinner. Is this 30?
i just wanted have a romantic star gaze moment with him. untill he let out a massive fart.
Randomize
