i love how cold weather makes identifying sluts easier. is it below freezing? is she wearing a tube top? she's easy.
can your parents tell?
i just had a cookie in one hand and a phone in the other and tried to eat my phone...they know
I am way too high for this. Some guy just keeps talking about music and life goals and he apparently has lived in every city we mention we are going
Well he told me I'd never be a wizard, and so I responded with you'll never have a big penis. After that we both just sat there and cried.
and then you seriously asked him to senior prom..which freaked him out since you told him earlier you were 22
We enjoyed our moment of partial gayness together
hell no. i was not wasting my two tears of virginity on him.
This is why we can never be together. Well that and we r married to other ppl but that's very minor detail compared to the coffee issue
I just ate apple sauce in my underwear. This isn't 30. This is 3.
I just want to hook up with Ed Sheeran. Why does it have to be so difficult?
? I'm just sitting watching something borrowed alone, crying in my boxers , feel like I should probably do something
All I wanted to do was come home from work and masturbate for national sex day... I sliced my the tip of finger giving myself a pedicure so I can’t even do that #singlelife
Can you get the dildos out of the shower before the maids come?
I aimed for bossy but it came out slutty
Come over I need help. I just almost died in an acid flashback while listening to do You Feel Like We Do off of the Frampton Comes Alive album.
Randomize
