dude, wtf is with her now? she has stuff up about how i am kicking her while she's down
wtf? who are you bitching about me to now?
there is a puppy in the bar... no really i didnt steal this one
We had sex on the first date...do you think he thinks I'm a whore?
Yes and so do I
My itunes is telling me i listened to toxic by b spears 108 times last night
I just snuked. Sneezed and puked
best friends dont let best friends get an STD of the eyeball just saying
I need moral support for this bender
Dude.. full face helmets and hangovers do not mix... I am never going to get rid of the smell of puke.
Rule number one to being a good adult: don't use your vagina as an icebreaker. Just some wisdom I thought I'd pass down from experience.
Lets get coked out and steal a parrot this summer
slept with a 6'5 mountain man from Montana and then he played 'Girls Just Wanna Have Fun' on repeat..
Remember when you brought a guy home from the bar... to our parents house.... on thanksgiving eve?
i read his ps3 instant messaging thing... he's meeting a guy to have sex. i think your boyfriend's gay
You took your pants and underwear off as soon as we got to Melissa's and just walked around the entire time like it was completely normal. We even ate pizza together with your vagina exposed. You're my hero.
He was someone so memorable that I'd completely forgotten he'd existed up to and during the encounter
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