that drag queen yelled at him and touched me to make him jealous and said things like this is what a real man feels like. it was a thrill.
If its called oral, why is it so hard to talk?
New major. Tourism Management. I dont know what it is but it sounds like something all the stupid slutty failed business management majors do.
I kinda volunteered your dick to help her deal with her virginity issues. Figured you wouldn't mind.
Dude, they are shaking the RV, yell at them. It feels like i'm being rocked to sleep, I don't like it, I'm not a baby.
That sucks about the drama. But hey, it's always a good day when you see someone get tazed!
I don't know where I am and I feel like a hippo shat in my mouth. This sofa is comfy though.
Turns out lunch break sex with someone you cant stand being around for any amount of time just makes you wish you had gone to get tacos like you originally planed.
Good news. I heard back from the doctor and I don't have a liver problem.
...yet.
I woke up at 4am on the floor covered in olive oil and fire extinguisher powder but all I wanted to know was where the rest of my booze was at.
Everyone keeps telling me I look so healthy and happy today: the power of the penis people!!
I had a dream about that dude. It was the first time I had a dream about him since the tryst.
The tryst?
The hookup. I like using sophisticated words for my foolish decisions. Makes me retain some dignity.
At one point she whispered in my ear "I overdrew my bank account today" but besides that it was an awesome lap dance
Just threw up in the trash can at my desk. I guess "beating the hangover" eventually leads to this.
I'll probably just end up banging you in your parents marital bed,in their honor of course.
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