I dont need to watch it. And stop comparing your life to Entourage.
The one night I bring a girl home you leave the footloose soundtrack playing.
He's trying to wipe up all the spilled drinks with a banana
Its a three day weekend with Valentines day thrown in... Im obligated to get drunk
sorry for throwing an entire water bottle of vodka at you. It was very wasteful
Yes I want to fuck your friends but it's out of respect and love for you.
I'd just like to inform all involved that walking into a liquor store holding a milk crate at the beginning of a night as stock ends badly
You'd be amazed at how difficult it is to find pics of the helicopter dick
I am very proud of your internet skills
You're the only person I know who would be upset about making out with a girl you like. You're like a drunken Charlie Brown.
Tommarow we shall sacrifice the freshmen to the sun god
The sad part is that if I don't get a random pic of your balls or ass or both every month, I start to worry that we're not friends anymore
I have the WORST hangover. Pretty sure my liver fell out while taking a dump. THAT bad.
Besides, I'm booked tomorrow. I'm planning on drinking heavily and crying in the bath.
Do you think you could cook pancakes while i blow you?
long story short, he tried to fuck me standing up, toppled over, and now I have four stitches next to my eye
Randomize
