Then he told me I had the most beautiful looking vulva
Want updates from david's night out drinking? If so text back DAVID to this number. Std rates apply.
Its official. Iv'e been kicked out of a bar in every state. I would like to take my job and travel time for allowing this to happen.
Don't park in the garage. I installed a stripper pole while drunk and it's kinda in the way
For her birthday she wants to, " try something different with our butts a funnel and a bottle of whiskey"
Thats not what we're looking for. I want this kid to suck a lolly pop out of a stripper's snatch.
I was galloping around pretending to give birth to pbrs. I could have used a mask.
And then I cried about the Cubs for a half hour. If my dignity hadn't already been lost by that point in the night, it sure as hell was then.
Pencil dick carries the name proudly.
I don't care if we're married you can't just walk into the bedroom with a pizza box expecting to get laid
Sorry for cyberstalking your dad.
I wonder what dick looks like without astigmatism?
Jeff brought me a cup of coffee to my desk. He's getting a blow job.
My mom said "I saw the signs you guys were high, so I made the spaghetti"....so ya, I'd say she definitely knew
Is there a sexuality term for 'only wants hatefucks'?
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