i puked in the mini-firdge
we don't have a mini-fridge?
bought one. it ws too cheap to pass up. xcept now there's puke in it,,, but the freezer's fine so i feel pretty good about that
I wish you wouldn't refer to your breast milk as "ammunition"
did anyone else see me puking into my coat sleeve?
Also, we should really buy some bandaids. Right now I'm using toilet paper and scotch tape, but I don't really think that's sanitary.
and then he tried plucking my nose hairs. lines were crossed.
I threw up on my way to work while listening to "the good times are killing me". this award goes to modest mouse for creating the most poetic puke ever
It wasn't so much skinny dipping. It more like skinny walking...through a fountain.
I couldn't drown my sorrows in an ocean of jack daniels. They may have scuba gear.
I just figured out how I'm going to tie you to my bed. Hint: I may have to go to the auto parts store before you get here.
i think i just encouraged him to glue googly eyes to my boobs
I told him the only reason I'd sleep with him is if we have a threesome because I'll need moral support
It was bitter sweet because I woke him up with sex but then I peed in his bed with him in it
It might look like I curled my hair last night but it's just the jiz.
You just kept telling everyone to call you MFT.. Mother Fucking Tornado.
I cant promise hot guys but i can promise alcohol which is close enough.
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