fuck dude i blacked out on a tuesday. what am i doing with my life?
Winning.
Let's create a 16 and pregnant drinking game
may have given a homeless man 70 dollars in exchange for his sandals. so yea, i'm going as jesus for next halloween.
How many folks do you know who bring coke to a dinner party. Seriously.
There's a bed on the roof. The window behind it is too small for it to go through. I'm impressed.
They're re-releasing Titanic in 3-D. Can I interest you in a joint venture to create the greatest drinking game of all time? I think yes
I just had a full choir singing the phrase pudding cup in my head. Too. Stoned.
Not sure. All I know is that she has a tight dark green skirt and I will not rest until I have used my teeth to rip it off of her
Celebrating anything "Eve" is never a good choice! I feel like my soul's been put in a blender on the "destroy" setting- in other news: Happy 4th of July
We had half a pitcher of beer left and he asked us if we wanted a to-go cup. Fuck yeah we want it to-go.
I bet, I woke up to you like naked at 4 in the morning shoving a sandwich in your face
There's Dick Pix, Zorro, and The Little Engine that Could. I nickname my fuck buddies for the exact same reason why you don't name animals which you will one day have for dinner.
But on the plus side, what he lacked in size he made up for with speed. And grunting.
Do you know that you can buy Cialis in Mexico? Best. Honeymoon. Ever.
I think the cashier at 7/11 might be planning an intervention for me.
Randomize
