so i was creeping on him today and there was like nothing new except he became a fan of getting dome
i wish i could be like. "i like giving dome, lets be friends"
Last night at the bar my fuck buddies found out about each other.
Wtf? What happened?
Not quite sure but they rock, paper, scissored to see who was taking me home.
i offered her breakfast shots. she politely declined.
this is you don't wonder off at 3 am with no pants on. Just stay there and pray to god you don't get arrested for being on school property.
The yard is growling at me WHAT DID U GIVE ME?
He wouldn't give me a cup of water for my bong so i sat in the drive thru to run up the timer until he gave it to me.
Beer pong consisted of me throwing a ball at the wall and then falling over because moving my arm made me dizzy. I think our team lost.
I remember key bumps, porn and a mom in my bed. Sums up my day.
that is an amazing summary hahaha
Some guy just rode an office chair down my street, I hope he comes back so I can give him my number.
I just ran into mom and dad day drinking at the bar while I skipped class and was day drinking at the same bar.
I'm eating ramen over the toilet. Fuck my life
last night you told me I had a dark, salty butthole
So when he asked me to go on a date tonight, I didn't think the words "have you tried a suppository" would be part of the evening.
Well, at least you look pretty when you're disgusted
because nothing says “let’s fucking rage” like getting a compensation letter and some company stock
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